You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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