I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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