He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
