I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
