She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
