At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize