Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
