One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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