You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize