1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
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Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
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She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize