I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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