It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
