There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
My liver just had a heart attack.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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