and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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