All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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