this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
