And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
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this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
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Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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