I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize