i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
