Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
