she was so not down for the gang bang
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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