so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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