she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Did you just see the Batmobile???
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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