i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
