i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
