No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Randomize
