$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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