Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
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I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
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you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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