real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.