go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she smelled like a LAN party
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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