I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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