She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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