i permit you to call me
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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