I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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