a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
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