ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
