Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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