problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
