some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
