I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
