I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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