So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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