I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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