I'm gonna have a badass scar
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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