He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Randomize
