is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
he fucked my hip out of place.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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