sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
