apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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