your thong is hanging out like whoa
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
