so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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