Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize
