I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize