btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize